Is This The Worst Film of All Time?
The Barbaric Beast of Boggy Creek (1985)
You shouldn’t really expect much of a DVD which is in the bargain bin section of the local movie shop so when a work colleague brought this film in one day me and a few guys at work decided to watch it.The alarm bells were already ringing when we viewed the cover, the front of it had this terrifying Bigfoot-esque creature howling loudly, arms outstretched in a fearful rage and the back of the cover had errrr a man in a gorilla suit!
Front Cover Image
Back Cover Image
So onto the film, this is actually a sequel to The Legend of Boggy Creek, an early 70s local ‘hit’ for director Charles B Pierce so as the norm in the movie game some bright spark decided to make this sequel. The opening scenes(which by now already seemed to go on forever) show various flowers, marshlands of Arkansas until the camera pans out to view the local river. Then along comes our ‘man in the gorilla suit’ oh sorry I meant this barbaric beast to drink at the water hole.
So what’s the plot you ask? Well a professor decides to go to the swampland to see if the ‘monster’ exists and decides to take three students with him!!! DING DING hello! Plot fail number one, would three students be allowed to do this? Also during the film the Professor has flashbacks as a young boy of seeing the ‘monster’. So professor you actually already know it exists so why the exhibition?
The professor is played by Charles B Pierce, who if you need reminding directed it and wrote it…I think you are starting to get the message. The three students are ridiculously inept at acting, Cindy Butler(this was her last acting part) so one good thing came from this film, Serene Hedin (sounds like a porn stars name) and Chuck Pierce, yep Charles son who decided to help pops save some of the films budget by playing Tim, who walks around with his top off most of the film and his acting is so wooden I’d half expect him to be admitted to the local tree surgeon suffering from woodworm!
The most tension filled part of this movie is when they go into an old wooden hut and are chased by a dog, the dog is so clever it manages to smash its way into the hut (still trying to figure that one out) Once the dog gets in ol’ Charles has a shotgun in his hands, loaded and misses the dog from three feet! Utterly ridiculous!
During the camping scenes I actually got a little uncomfortable watching Charles perv over the students getting changed as the camera zooms into the posterior of Serene Hedin. So after camping out, having flashbacks, the professor finally figures out why the Boggy Creek monster is hanging around the area. Yes of course it was obvious, a disgusting fat hillbilly had kidnapped a baby Boggy monster and was holding him captive. So the professor saves the day, hands baby boggy back to mom and they walk off into the sunset.
A special mention must go to the make-up artist Pam Pierce and the boat renter Mack Pierce. More family members who got roped into helping Charles create his ‘masterpiece’.
If you decide to watch this film, remember that 71 minutes could be spent hitting yourself with a big stick, you’ll enjoy it more! I haven’t seen the latest Boggy Creek(2010) but I’m looking forward to Alien/Predator vs Boggy Creek Monster, Star Wars VII, Return of the Boggy.